New Direction

ATTENTION TO ALL

This blog is now devoted to blogging on my bands activity.The following bands are as such:

Pop Punk Influenced Shit Johny Law!	Acoustic Music Inspired By the 90s Cap-Gun
Indie Rock With a Chick Kt & the Goodbyes	Folk Punk from Crozet Paper Lanterns

A little about myslef

I'm pathetic.
I'm lonely.
I'm worthless.
I'm unhappy.
I'm trying.
I'm disappointed in myself.
I'm unlovable.
I'm ugly.
I'm repulsive.
I'm clumsy.
I'm foolish.
I'm dumb.
I'm anything but perfect.
I'm ready to just end this terrible thing called life, because if anything I'm just making those whom I interact with miserable and only drag them down.
Is it time to kill myself? No.
Do I just keep suffering? Story of my life.

Where am I?

last goodbyes and regrets
haven't found motivations yet
slipping down the wells
water filled emotions, in a fell
containment, entrapment, denial, and fear
the feels of my living year
tell me was life this way in past
or is the future just aftermath?
living contamination is my emotion
a hazardous expression in motion
pulling down the well brick by brick
my whole family makes me sick

Johnny Law Demo (Part I)

The time, 7:20am. What am I doing? Well I'm laying wide awake on the couch shirtless in Peter's basement of course. As if being excited to get out demo CD done today wasn't enough to keep me up (like a kid the night before doing to Disney World), I had ten cups of coffee yesterday along with some other stimulants. Peter ended up falling asleep last night around 2:30am while I sat on my tumblr and then chatted with people on facebook chat. I also managed to watch Hot Fuzz, draw a picture, and now I'm typing up this post.

So, let's talk about this demo CD. It will have two tracks that are acoustic (Persephone and Chose Wrong) along with the songs Shit Hole, Still Waiting, Common Sense, and maybe one more. We need to work on the last three today - then burn the CDs and print the track lists. I've been doing all the recording myself with Audacity, and although it kind of sucks, it gets the job done.

Magic

whoa, yummy.

I need a diary

I don't know who to rant to about this. And I don't know who to cry to. I don't want to bother people and make them feel upset knowing there aren't that many people who care about me as much as I care about them. I don't want to be homeless again. I don't want to not have a good friend. I don't want to be alone. I'll I'm looking for is a place called home.

Once again, my family is getting evicted. We didn't get the house up the street and have no back up plan. I don't know where to go, who to go to, or what to do with my life. This is making college very difficult and my house has collapsed to a field filled with rage and emotion. When no one is around I can hear Heather and Hooks fighting up stairs about how they need us out of the house and how we're horrible people. I guess this means I don't deserve a home.

It's been so long since I've lived in a house, a fucking common thing that people take for granted. I miss privacy and the feeling of having a home, and the last time I had that feeling was when I was dating Maxi. She was the only thing in the past two years that has made me feel at all at home, and she's already fucking gone. Now the basement, the place I live that doesn't even give me that feeling, is being taken away. What is this cruel life I lead and why me? What have I done that I deserve a situation that is most likely to flunk me out of college.

I need a place to live basically, and I have no idea where to go. I might as well just leave and never come back, because from the looks of it - this cycle is never going to end. I wasn't intended to have a home, or love, or happiness. The only thing that I've loved that hasn't hurt me is music, and once I lose that - I might as well kill myself, because then I will have nothing left to live for...

PVCC? - Oh' Golly Gee!

	This is my life right now. I am at home, alone, about to go to sleep.
	This is me writing lyrics yesterday for my new band with Peter called "My Conflict". I am excited and also very motivated.

Forgot about school... fuck.

Singles Awareness Day (Part II)

Today I woke up and played music in the bathroom while grooming myself. I spent some time updating my profile picture and playing guitar. Then my dad and I went to the house we may move into. It's two minutes up the road, small, and cute. Then I came back and got together my supplies. I went to Blythe's casa and unloaded all of the supplies. I started on making Marta my wonderful brownies. I made a batch and drank a beer, chillin and doing some dishes. The brownies finished and I let them cool while Blythe got all dolled up. We went to see Zym and work and then I went to Krogers. I searched with Blythe for the best set of flowers... in my price range. The range was wide but not too much. I picked out the ones I liked best and re-organized them into a better bouquet. A beautiful arrangement. I wrapped the bottom in a wet paper towel and some aluminum foil. I then took pink cloth and wratted it around the bottom of the bouquet. Than another strip tied in a cute lil' bow ♥ just for some one very cute. I packed up the brownies and headed to her house. Out to the car and on the seat were the two things I worked all day to make. Happy Valentines Day ♥

Although it could have been much better, hanging out with her is enough of a gift to make any day awesome.

Singles Awareness Day (Part I)

Tomorrow will be really nice out and I will be with some one really nice and since they are really nice it will be a really nice day. I hope my day is filled with adventure and cute things, thus it will be a good day. And since a good part of it will be with someone very cute it's already sounding nice. I plan to go somewhere with cute animals, and some where to make eats. Then someplace pretty and exciting and maybe new. Music sounds like a good mix, as always. Maybe kites in the park, maybe something like that? Cupcakes maybe? Sure as hell none of that chocolate cliche. Well, maybe ♥ Funny photos, and jokes, and getting to make an awesome friend. And awesome day.




We'll have to wait and see

It's Been A While : And I Don't Give A Shit

I miss Maxi still. Life goes on.
PVCC is pretty sweet.
Yup.

Lisa Kolgan - ♥

SCHEDULE ZOO

Rock Rock Rock n' Roll High School

Today I woke up.
Today I ate an orange.
Today I made some phone calls.
Today I went to Western Albemarle High School.
Today I saw people I've missed.
Today I saw John Barnes.
John is really cool.
Today I thought about Maxi.
Today I wrote a paper.
Today I wrote a bitchin' paper.
My paper was on Same-sex Marriage.
Today I edited my paper.
Today I went to work.
Today I washed dishes.

Today was interesting. I talked late into the night with Maxi last night and enjoyed talking things over with her. Its seems that things aren't too bad, and that a break is generally what she/I needed. There's a lot more to it than that, but basically things aren't so bad, and life isn't that bad, and school isn't that bad, and its all good because life goes on.

Listen to this Shit
House Boat - The Delaware Octopus: Catchy Pop-Punk featuring Mikey Erg and member from the Steinways. I think its fun and a good "I have nothing to listen to" kinda music.

Park Ave. - When Jamie Went to London we Broke Up: Awesome Indie rock music. Kind of emotional'ish but really captivating. Good lyrics on top of good songs. This was Connor Oberst's (Brighteyes') first band.

The Exploding Hearts - Shattered:Powerful Power Pop Placed in Oregon. The once amazing band The Exploding hearts played the best heart break, punk rawk, bubble gum, boss n' roll music I've yet to listen to. To bad they all died (with the exception of their drummer) on their first tour when they got hit by and 18 wheeler in their van.

And the Curtain Closes

Exit stage left, cue broken heart. Act II - recovery.

It's nice to see that the stage is so familiar though.

I feel the acting isn't really acting at all

So why can't I get over this little bump? Why?

Because you loved her. And time will make it fine

...Thank Pizza Crust we're friends, and thank Andrew Jackson I know its not the end of the world.

The Ergs! (Part II)